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Best of Brakfast Episode 174 Yana Bolder
Everybody has done it.
You wake up, stare at the ceiling and think:
“I really cannot face work today.”
Sometimes you genuinely feel ill.
Sometimes life gets overwhelming.
And sometimes you simply need a break from emails, meetings, customers, spreadsheets or pretending to care about another motivational team update.
Over the years, people have come up with some incredibly creative excuses for taking a day off.
Here are some of the classics.
“I’ve Got A Stomach Bug”
The all-time champion of day-off excuses.
Difficult to question.
Impossible to prove.
And detailed enough that most managers do not want follow-up information.
The stomach bug remains one of Britain’s most reliable workplace escape routes.
“I’ve Got A Migraine”
A genuine medical issue for many people, but also one of the most commonly used reasons for needing a dark room and zero human interaction.
Mostly because nobody can really argue with it.
“The Boiler’s Broken”
Especially effective during winter.
Suddenly you are trapped at home waiting for an engineer who may or may not arrive sometime between 8am and 6pm.
Entire workdays have disappeared thanks to boiler emergencies.
“My Child Is Ill”
Parents automatically unlock a whole new category of understandable absences.
And because children have an incredible ability to become ill at the worst possible times, this excuse rarely raises suspicion.
“There’s Been A Family Emergency”
The intentionally vague option.
Serious enough to avoid further questions.
Flexible enough to cover almost anything.
“My Car Won’t Start”
An excuse that has existed almost as long as cars themselves.
Especially believable during cold weather when every vehicle in Britain suddenly develops mysterious issues.
“I’ve Got Food Poisoning”
Like the stomach bug, this usually ends conversations immediately.
Nobody wants additional detail.
“I Need To Wait For A Delivery”
Modern life has made this one far more believable.
Furniture deliveries.
Appliances.
Broadband engineers.
Parcels requiring signatures.
Half the country appears to spend its life waiting for delivery slots.
“The Trains Are Cancelled”
In the UK, this barely even counts as an excuse anymore.
It is simply a realistic possibility.
“I Need A Mental Health Day”
One positive change in recent years is that people are becoming more open about mental wellbeing.
Sometimes people are not physically ill.
They are simply exhausted, overwhelmed or burned out.
And increasingly, workplaces are recognising that mental health matters too.
The Excuses That Definitely Sound Fake
Of course, some excuses instantly sound suspicious.
“My goldfish is traumatised.”
“I accidentally glued my hand to the table.”
“There’s a swan outside my house and I can’t leave.”
Oddly specific excuses often create more questions than answers.
Why People Really Take Days Off
The reality is that most people occasionally need time away from work.
Modern life can be exhausting.
Stress builds up.
People get tired.
And sometimes a single day off can genuinely help someone reset and recharge.
Most managers know this too, even if nobody says it out loud.
The Bottom Line
Whether genuine, exaggerated or slightly creative, workplace excuses have become part of office culture.
Some are believable.
Some are legendary.
And some become stories that survive in workplaces for years afterwards.
But deep down, most people understand the real reason many of us occasionally take a day off.
Sometimes we simply need one.
Over To You…
What is the funniest or most memorable excuse for a day off you have ever heard?
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